Is 13 Too Young for Birth Control?

Too many young teens are sexually active. We asked a doctor how young is too young for birth control.

It is a rare week that I don’t come across a pregnant teen. I don’t give even a second thought to 17- or 18-year-olds, but the 15- or 16-year-olds still bother me. Once in a while, I will see a 14-year-old, and in the last 10 years I have come upon several 13-year-old pregnant girls. Those instances were not related to any form of sexual abuse because the fathers were no older or wiser.

So, this raises the question: how old should a teen be before starting birth control?

My answer is: as soon as they become sexually active, if not before. This may not be the answer most parents want to hear, but after personally seeing so many unwanted pregnancies among teen girls at my hospital, I don’t have any other answer.

Parents may respond that providing their children with birth control is tantamount to giving them permission to have sex. But teens aren’t going to wait for permission. They will have sex when they are pressured, convinced, succumb, or simply just do it.

One teen girl recently confided in me that she had her first sexual experience in the dressing room at Macy’s. I asked her what made her decide to lose her virginity in a dressing room and she responded, “No reason, it just happened.” She is 13, and so is her boyfriend. I inquired if they used birth control or considered the possibility of her becoming pregnant, and she said no to both questions. She didn’t seem to be bothered at all by the fact that they’d had unprotected sex.

Teens don’t seem to think it will happen to them the first time. With their limited knowledge, they don’t even know that penetration isn’t even necessary for pregnancy to occur. And once a teen experiences sex, they don’t seem to have any hesitation about doing so again and again. Very few realize they made a mistake and vow not to repeat it.

Luckily, this girl and her mom immediately sought out birth control for her.

That didn’t happen in my family. My mother had 5 kids before she was 20, and her first pregnancy occurred when she was 13. She didn’t raise us. Our grandparents took on that role for three of us. The other two were given up to a neighbor down the street.

My point about mentioning my mother is to illustrate that young parents don’t make good decisions. And their lack of judgment affects them, and their children, for the rest of their lives. Having sex is a one-time physical encounter, but getting pregnant is a lifetime commitment to your offspring. Unfortunately, many teen parents aren’t able to do so, or they do a terrible job.

Is it medically safe for a 12- or 13-year-old to be on birth control? Birth control for teens is a better choice than an unwanted pregnancy anytime. Teens don't always think ahead, and they may not remember to take a pill every day either (but low-dose pills are best), so the patch may be the best way to go.

Even though birth-control pills carry risks, the risks of becoming pregnant and carrying a baby, and the risks to infants of very young girls, are much higher (not to mention the social implications of teen pregnancy).

Finally..parents, if you are concerned about the decisions your teen may be making regarding sexual activity, don't be judgmental. Remember, you were a teen once, too, and what was it you wanted?

Someone to talk to.

So, as your daughter is growing up, keep the lines of communication open. Let her know that she can always come to you for advice. But remember, this starts when your daughter is young and jumps in your lap—not when she is old enough for someone else's lap.

As the product of a teen mom, believe me, I know what I speak of. In my book, I relate the difficulties my siblings and I encountered because of our mother’s choices as a teen. Of course, she wasn’t alone in her irresponsibility. So was our father, whoever he was, but that – the absent father – is another issue.

Ramon Resa has been a pediatrician in private practice in Central California for more than 20 years. He is a sought-after speaker whose recently published memoir, “Out of the Fields: My Journey from Farmworker Boy to Pediatrician,” has inspired readers nationwide. Learn more at www.ramonresamd.com.