My 13 Year Old Wants A Boob Job!

I'm a teen and I think this is probably just a phase. Her boobs will even out in a year or so... I mean, I didn't even HAVE boobs until I was almost 15... that was mortifying as well. But now I have perfectly perky C cups. anyway haha she will get over it. The nose job thing will go away too... show her some pictures of heidi montag. That should snap her right out of it! All girls go through a phase of insecurity. Just make sure she doesn't develope something like an eating disorder. If she's already self concious that's what I would be worrying about more than plastic surgery since she can't get that legally for 5 years (not to mention she won't be able to afford it without your help...). Help her feel beautiful and don't bother her about it so much. be suddle, and maybe cut down on her tv hours a bit...

As ridiculous as this scenario sounds (and as grateful I am to have not been victim to it) I have to say I'm not too surprised to hear about girls that age taking plastic surgery so lightly.

It's certainly one thing that has become far more mainstream, and thus acceptable, by way of celebrities (lindsay and britney) and tv (nip tuck, in particular).

They just see it as a legitimate option to fix something they think is wrong.

However, I MUST agree that teens are fickle. They often want things at one age that they don't care for shortly after.

Then again, they're also very stubborn and opinionated, and want to be treated as adults, so if you try to tell them it's just a phase that they will grow out of, or if it's something they don't really need because they aren't full grown yet - it's only going to fuel the desire to get what they want.

That said, I suppose it sounds like the only thing you can really do is keep comforting and reassuring her about how beautiful and perfect she already is in the meantime ...

If her breasts remains significantly different sizes after she has finished developing, then it's not so much a matter of "boob job" as it is a corrective procedure to even things out. I do think that it is something that ought to wait until she is a bit older, but this is something that could help her feel better about herself. Personally, I think the nose job and (love the phrase!) the 90s "big fake, tan boobs" part is more concerning, and I would encourage you to help her separate them out. Maybe increasing her exposure to women with different styles - still young and fun, but more creative and classy.

Sounds like the typical teen, which is self centered and focused only on the superfical. Trying changing the focus! Get her involved in helping others less fortunate than her, like at a hospital, food shelter, animal shelter or other place where the focus is not on superfical looks but reality and priorities of life. Also studying the Bible helps instill values and morals that encourage selflessness instead of selfishness. I'm not saying your daughter is selfish, but being obsessed with superfical looks is vanity. But the doing of good for others and learning what the Bible really teaches on such matters...never gets old, gets wrinkled or goes out of style.

maybe you should help her rebuild that shattered self confidence and her self esteem. most of the celebrities who get plastic surgery for superficial reasons (men and women) are doing so because they lack these two things. the more self confidence, self esteem, and self worth she has the less she'll think she needs plastic surgery to "correct" what she feels is flawed.

yes it may or may not correct itself (the two different breast sizes) as she grows, but at the end of the day she still needs to be able to look in the mirror and say, "i'm beautiful".

I had self esteem issues all through my teen and 20's and always wanted a nose job. I actually looked into it when I was in my 20's but all I had to do was look at the MANY pictures of screwed up plastic surgery and that cured any desire immediatly. She is going through a phase and as long as you make sure she continues to be involved in sports and other activities that will boost her self esteem I am sure she will be fine. My stepdaughter went through the same phase as well as her mother getting breast implants despite already being beautiful. It was very painful as well as you can't just get one surgery!!! There is maintenance involved! I think the suggestion to involve her in community service activies in an excellent one. She will feel terrific about herself for helping others! Thank you for adopting! You sound like a wonderful parent.

Women who get boob jobs are doing it for the money. The thought is, more male attention, more money. It's that simple. I am waiting for the time when men and women feel good about women because of who they are, not what they have.

If she is very lopsided, health insurance may pay for it- I know someone who years later is pleased she had the corrective surgery for this....but hopefully she'll get a boyfriend who tells her likes having variety all in one girl or something.

Your daughter may want many things, but that does not mean you need to give them to her. My "chicken cutlets" and have her place one in the bra cup of the smaller-sized breast/ Other than that, you should not get involved. If people make fun of her, she needs to fight for herself. Children need to work things out on their own. Children today are wimps and should not expect they are going to go through life without bumps and bruises. Your daughter is going through a tough stage, but so is every other 13 year old!

I read the first two paragraphs and I am so outraged that I am going to have to wait to continue reading this article. First I want to start by saying,"What the Hell?!!" This is just sad to see in our society. I hate to say it but, "The future is here." I guess I just wasn't ready for it. I just started using email, something that I did for about two years and havn't done in almost eight. I am 19 years of age and I am sad to say that I come from the last disconnected generation. Except for the fact that all of this connectivity has been sprouting and maturing the whole time I was growing up. I remember the "brick" phones and the pagers and when Super Nintendo was considered peak performance at least for me because my parents couldn't afford the 64 bit system. I have seen those in my generation cling to the screen and those who chose to look the other way more often than not. We were the experimental generation in my eyes. I in many ways am ashamed of my generation and the media damage that has been caused to it. Seems to me that having sex and being a thug is popular these days. And don't even get me started on all of the social networking sites. To me alot of these social outlets are leading to the social demise of our future generations if we do not prevent our children from being sucked in too early on. I don't text and I do not participate in social networking and I still have friends and good ones at that. If I want to meet people I go out and meet them and if I want to get ahold of someone I call them and or leave a message if they are not available. To me a phone call will always mean more than typed words. People and kids especially are becoming lazy and inwardly drawn. And I am now beginning to notice what I have always suspected. Articles describing negative feelings and warnings directed towards all of our "Wonderful Technology." And alot of this is due to overuse and improper use of these outlets by both kids and adults. All of this turmoil has in fact led me to being more dedicated to physical and mental well-being by exercising and taking more of an interest in education and now more than ever, sociology and protecting children from our out of control media. And I am never one to comment on stuff like this either but I do now in hopes of someone reading this and maybe making a difference in the way they will approach these types of things in the future for both themselves and especially their children. And I wish more people in my generation would speak up and out against what they feel is not right in this country. I think it's time for America to step outside of it's self and take a look in at what's going on. It's time to fix the problems going on in this country but not giving up on the rest of the world either. Balance is what is important for all existence to remain comfortable and thriving. I feel like I'm at the point that some of my icons were at 40+ years ago, icons like The Jefferson Airplane and Frank Zappa to name a miniscule amount of them. They warned about the Plastic Fantastic ways and how the image would become infectious and out of control. I can imagine how they felt going into the 80s and 90s but little did they know what was to come with the new millennium. It literally scares the crap out of me to see the ever broadening gap between the generations that seems to get bigger and bigger with every passing month. Sometimes I think we are advancing too quickly technologically for ourselves to keep up. Go Capitalism right? HA! What a joke. It's time to get out of this techno funk that we are in. Everyone is acting like a bunch of addicts who have to get the geek fix. And I could go on and on but I will stop here before I really get angry about all of this. Anthony

I am 24, so not too removed from this phase. You start the article by stating that you want your daughter to share your opinion. That just won't work. Its important to realize that for our generation, cosmetic surgery is just as viable an option as, well, cosmetics. My advice would be to keep your opinions to yourself, encourage her to research procedures, payment options etc. When she is old enough and financially sound enough to choose, she will know what's best for her.

My step daughter had a similar issue. My wife took her to the family doctor who prescribed her birth control pills. Because the pills are saturated with hormones it helped her within a year. So surgery is not necessarily the only answer.

Just saying, I'm 23, have had a baby, and my boobs still aren't quite the same size.... Just saying...

What you are really forgetting is that they're 13! And their minds change faster than fashions at that age. Even if they were to be thinking about future careers and colleges now- 90% of it would be forgotten in a year. Tell her that she's fine to get what ever she wants done when she's 18 and can pay for it herself, but until that time why not take her to get a water bra or something? Or better yet, start taking her down to local universities so that she can find more interest in pursuing a higher education- along with her friend Ashley. Shell more than likely grow out of this phase, but if not then simply tell her that you'll be there for her but you won't help her pay for something that you don't believe she needs. (And you might want her to talk to some women with large boobs- since more often then not they are a PAIN, literally! Back pain, saggy boobs when you get old, men not paying attention to YOU just looking at your boobs...)

May I suggest to listen a little more closely to your therapist, who is recommending NOT going to Defcon 5 over this, which is what you're doing. Plus, I think Daughter and her friends might have been having some fun at your expense with all the "big fake,, tan boobs" business....you were visibly horrified and they thought it was funny that you were horrified when they weren't even serious. Be supportive and honest with Daughter.
1. Reaffirm whenever it comes up that she's beautiful as she is and has alot of growing/filling left to do (l like to ask mine if they think I am ugly or unattractive...they say no, and I say "See, au naturale, baby. Britney can bite me."
2. Evil girls probably have the same or similar asymmetry (I do, btw)
3. Understand that this too shall pass. I'd keep an eye on it, but don't go making a big deal out of it when it's just passing teenage paranoia. She's got 5 years before she can legally get the boob job, and if you're not paying then it even longer, so she's bound to grow out of this. She's playing dress up with the idea. I'd just keep reiterating that this idea looks terrible.
I also like telling her that guys don't like plastic...which is true. Not to be graphic, but they don't want their girlfriends to look like the centerfolds they hide under the bed, says my husband.

Is she lopsided meaning the breasts look similar only one is a bit bigger or smaller? Or does she have poland syndrome aka P.S. (named for Dr. Poland who discovered the syndrome). P.S. can be mild with only muscles missing usually on one side of the chest/breast or it can involve the ribcage, the arm, the hand and the fingers. I have mild P.S. Basically missing a pectoral which was more then just lopsided, I had some breast tissue below a concave area where the pectoral was missing. Having an implant helped my self esteem, nothing like filling out a bathing suit on one side and having a hollow area on the other side. If it is P.S. then it is corrective surgery and insurance should cover it. Though she may have to wait until she is 15-16 years of age before the Dr. will do the surgery. If it is only a difference in size without missing muscles, then she should wait and use a cutlet to help fill out her bra. See what happens and when she is over 16 closer to 18 then make the decision. Poland Syndrome is real and a lot more common then known. I even nursed all my children without problem as I had breast tissue on P.S. side, but no pectoral muscle. Tell your daughter she is not alone. There are many Poland Syndrome websites, check them out.

When I was 13 (I'm now 19) I was sure that as soon as I could I was going to get my boobs and nose done. This was such a phase and now I still think my nose could be smaller and boobs could be bigger, but I've come to terms with my body and I suddenly grew decent sized B/C cups last year. I'm sure your daughter will grow out of it as well. Just try stressing to her that plastic surgery is serious surgery that has complications and leaves scars.

Research shows that boobs matter. It is what it is.

TITS!!

My ex-wife had this condition. She was very beautiful and attractive. However, it does not "just go away." It will probably required surgery if she wants them even in size. HOWEVER, she should wait until she is older to do this as she is not fully developed yet.

imho

I know it's been almost a year since you published this. I'm not a mom but definatelly interested in the subject. I'm a Mexican student writing a thesis on gender specific media literacy. I've been researching ant talking with tweens and teens all over my country and some places in Canada, you're not alone, your girl is on the same page as many teen agers around the worls.The pressure that media puts over teens and tweens is just too much for them! But the fight is not over and we can help them, I invite you to visit http://www.media-awareness.ca/ it is a media awareness web site that help parents and teachers to guide their kids on this crazy media road. This article is particulary interesting for your case, but browse around the site, I'm sure you'll find other interesting things there: http://www.media-awareness.ca/english/parents/marketing/issues_teens_mar... . There's also an amazing book about this subject if you want to read it, it is called "So Sexy So Soon" writen by Diane Levin and Jean Kilbourne ... You are not the only mom concerned about this. And please ignore those who say that you should get over it and get her a boob job... You'll see after reading this it will be easier for you to advice and help your girl. :D Wish you the best on this teen journey. Let me tell you that talking about it in such open and honnest way with her is (according to any expert) the firs step of a great future for your girl. I hope this helps a little :D